Road Rage Rita, Communications Engineer

All successful expeditions must rely on highly trained crews to take care of day to day needs as well as the occasional breakdown or emergency.  The same is true of the Big Beastly Adventure.  Nui will be doing the driving but it is a known fact that to keep the Beast on the road requires nerves of steel, eyes of a hawk and both hands white-knuckled on the wheel.  This, of course, leads to a problem with what to do about idiot drivers who tail-gate, cut you off or, in some cases, have no clue how to merge onto a highway in front of a rapidly moving RV and Toad. 

What the voyage needed was a Communications Engineer.  A veteran traveller, Road Rage Rita (aka Trailer Trash, aka Recreational Rita), volunteered her services to, when appropriate, provide the proverbial one-finger salute which is the universal signal to other drivers that something is amiss and they need to fix it.  She demonstrated her manual dexterity at a recent wedding, when she awed family members with her ability to not only salute with her right hand but with her left - and sometimes simultaneously.  Skills like that are rare indeed - so it is an honor that Road Rage Rita has agreed to take on this important function.

The voyage to southern climes begins next week.  None too soon, either..... it snowed in Sudbury this morning!

What was that name again?

For those of you following the blog, it will seem that we'll be leaving for Arizona with the Beast crammed to the tailpipe with numerous co-pilots, all of them 84 years old.  Truth is that we've been having a hard time coming up with a name for my aunt.  We started out with Trailer Trash, but that implied that her wardrobe consisted entirely of spandex pants and high-heeled shoes, along with belly button rings.  Oh sure, maybe some days but not every day.  We scrapped that name in favour of "Recreational Rita", but there was some concern that the name made her sound like a woman of easy virtue or, more profitably, an exotic dancer.  It is also hard to type.  Next suggestion was "TraileRita" but this isn't a trailer, so that's out.  The latest incarnation is "Hoppin' Nana".  So far, that's what we're going with but there are still 2 weeks to go before the launch, so you never know.  We'll keep you posted.

Welcome to Recreational Rita

In about a month's time, the Big Beastly Adventure will continue, exploring never before seen vistas as the Beast heads for winter quarters in Yuma.  Every good voyage needs a co-pilot and Nui was thrilled to learn that her aunt, Recreational Rita, has decided to come aboard for the inaugural trip to the South.  This is great news!  RR and Nui have been known to stay up until dawn, looking for lunar eclipses or playing "that f***ing game".  The f***ing game is actually double solitaire but was renamed by RR's husband when he awoke and found them still playing cards, long after most people were in bed.  Recreational Rita likes to "look at stuff" and we have been surfing websites to find a whole lot of interesting stuff to do on the month-long trip to Arizona.

I should perhaps mention here that Recreational Rita is 84 years old and could still give a lot of 20 year olds a run for their money.  This is going to be a fun trip!

REST IN PEACE, PRINCE PORKETTA

It is with a very heavy heart that I have to report that Prince Porketta lost his long battle with pulmonary fibrosis today.  He was my brother and he was a good, good man.  He had a terrific sense of humor, and he had a huge heart - he truly cared about his family, friends, and co-workers.  Although his disease put him through hell, he never complained.  His standard answer to any question about his health was "I'm good". 

From childhood, he had a thirst for adventure and his first reaction to any suggestion was "let's go".  He would lead me into trouble (ummm....adventures) - everything from bidding on (and almost buying) a calf at an auction, to jumping off the roof of a barn and spraining both ankles, to hiking miles from home without telling our parents (we didn't sit for a week after the searchers found us - a well-deserved spanking!).  He was the first kid on the block to own a motorcycle - and the first one to crash it.  He took up skydiving and only quit because he had emergencies 2 out of the 3 times he jumped….. he was adventurous, but he was no fool. 

 The Prince is the reason I bought the Beast.  We had often talked about RV ownership but, other than looking at them, I hadn't thought seriously  about it.  Then, when his health deteriorated after his Vegas adventure, he told me he'd always wanted to see Mount Rushmore.  So I told him I'd buy a motorhome and take him, if he'd show me how to drive the thing.  And that was the start of last summer's adventure.  His doctor told him it was a bad idea….. but the Prince just said "let's go", which is exactly what we did.   We had so much fun that, again defying his doctor, he and his family decided to go back the way we came in September!  This summer, we planned the Tour D'Ont - a 2 week tour of eastern Ontario which led us to the areas our ancestors called home before moving to Markstay.  He didn't even tell his doctor about that one!  In between these trips, he also headed to Florida every winter for "spring training" (i.e. sitting by the pool with a cool adult beverage).

 We had a ritual.  When we arrived at a campground, he would put down the jacks and get the slides out.  I would go out and hook up the electricity and water.  He would then come out with 2 cans of beer and we would make a toast to our location.

So, Prince, I continued the ritual tonight.  Just because you got to the destination first is no reason to mess with tradition.  Here's to you, little brother.  I will miss you forever.  Thank you for everything!

 

 

 

 

 

A Little Close to Home

There are times when I have thought it would be nice to simplify and go back to camping in a tent.  Not today, though!  My friends Mike and Louise are camped across the street from me.  This morning, Mike was outside enjoying his coffee when a large black bear wandered onto his campsite.  The bear apparently didn't see Mike because he got within arm's reach of him!  At first Mike froze, but when the bear kept coming, he started to yell.  Instead of running away, the bear actually stepped closer.  Mike said he was so close he could have smacked him on the snout.  By this point, Mike was heading for the door to his camper.  The bear moseyed away towards the beach and wound up scaring the heck out of other campers further up the road.  The rangers have spotted 6 bears in the campgrounds so far and there were 13 sightings today alone. 

On further reflection, simplifying doesn't sound like such a good idea.  I'm sticking with the Beast!

Been There, Done That

Day 13…we think.  The Beast is still in one piece and is going to get to rest for awhile.  We made it to Grundy in record heat and humidity.  We plugged in and, within just a few short minutes, managed to blow the circuit breaker on the air conditioner.

It was like old home week in the trailer park.  Within minutes we were saying hello to fellow campers Bonnie and Wayne, Mike and Louise and Syd and Lynda.  Syd is really excited about finally getting his 3 bags of Montana dirt, which Nui has been lugging around since last summer.  Just for the record, for those who follow Nui's weather archives, the temps have dropped and it rained last night. 

 And just so Prince doesn't think there's no drama at the park, we were told today that all water in the park has been shut off so the faucets and bathrooms are off limits.  Thank heavens for Class A's.

Prince's wife will be happy to learn that Prince will be returning in almost pristine condition….  a few scuffs but no dents.  The same can't be said of the Beast.

The final task for the trip is to get Prince back to the city since, it turns out, he really doesn't enjoy camping.  His motivation is more geared towards finding ways to get Nui into trouble….I mean adventures.  Staying in one place just takes all the challenge out of that.

You Bet We're Having Fun!

The last stop on the Tour D'Ont took us to Orillia, to visit our youngest sister, Jackie.  We left Oshawa under sweltering heat, which only got worse when we reached Orillia.  Nui has been heard to say that she would never use air conditioning.  She just about tore Prince's arm off getting the thermostat down to 60 when he wanted to cap it at something like 72.  "My Rig, My Rules".  It got so cold that we had to keep the adult beverages in the fridge to keep them from freezing.

This morning Jackie treated us to an awesome buffet at Casinorama.  The food was delicious…. And there was so much of it that none of us could eat again all day, with the exception of a couple of popsicles.  This is good, since it was too hot to cook.

 We made our monetary contributions to the casino gods and headed back to Jackie's beautiful home (which needs a/c and her pool re-filled {eh, Jackie…nudge, nudge}) for a nice quiet evening of TV watching, which has been a rare treat during the tour.  TV is a good thing, since neither of us are particularly interesting.

Tomorrow, we're off to Grundy and putting down roots for the summer.  Prince is looking forward to returning to the city and his wife and family.  Nui is looking forward to swimming in a lake that isn't radioactive.